About AFC: First Person

Reflections on Coming Out, Sports, and HIV

By Marcus Andre Dodd, AFC Board Member

I am very proud to say that I just won a gold medal at the 2006 Gay Games in volleyball!

While I am very fortunate that academics have always come fairly easy to me, sports is an area where I have had to work very hard to achieve success. Some of my most memorable accomplishments include becoming a county champion in the 4x800m relay in high school, earning a varsity letter at Harvard in volleyball, completing the 2005 LaSalle Bank Chicago Marathon with the National AIDS Marathon training program, and most recently winning a medal in the Gay Games.

Sports have played an important role in my life. I have met many of my closest friends through sports. I learned how to be a team player by working through difficult times and situations on the court. Through sports, I have also challenged myself to see what I can accomplish. More importantly, sports and the people I have met through sports have truly shaped the person I am today.

I officially came out of the closet during my senior year of college. By “coming out” in this context I mean telling my college friends I am gay. Shortly after coming out I was encouraged by a dear friend to join the Boston Gay Basketball League. I learned that gay sports leagues provide a great venue for gay and gay-friendly people to meet one another outside of the bars and clubs. Further, sports and competition tend to break down barriers. When you are competing, it doesn’t matter what your ethnicity is or how rich or poor you are; all that matters is what skills you bring to the table and your will to compete.

In the Boston Gay Basketball League, I was fortunate to be drafted to a great team. We all hit it off quite well, both on and off the court. We went from five people who had never known each other to close teammates in a matter of weeks. It certainly helped that we won most of our games, and ultimately won the championship, but our friendship was based on a deeper sense of camaraderie.

Our team’s shooting guard, Juan, was a really funny guy. He was in his early 40s, born and raised in Puerto Rico. He was a good all-around basketball player, but had a very witty, and sometimes dry sense of humor. Juan and I became good friends.

About 5 years ago, after I had moved to Chicago, Juan died of AIDS. Juan was the first person I knew to lose his battle against this disease. Let me qualify that: I was well aware that people were dying of AIDS, and I knew of people who had died… but Juan was the first close friend of mine to succumb to the disease. This was an eye-opening experience because there is a big difference between knowing that people are dying of AIDS to actually losing a special person to the epidemic.

I now have a different perspective on HIV/AIDS. I am 31 years old; I wasn’t even a teenager when HIV/AIDS was first discovered. I was not sexually active during the 80s and early 90s as masses of people were being infected with HIV and dying of AIDS, many not aware of the facts and risks. When I first became sexually active, a new medical advance — combination therapy or “the cocktail” — had recently begun to prolong the lives’ of those living with HIV/AIDS. As a result, many people of my generation did not experience the deadliest decades of the AIDS crisis. I believe that some of the medical advances like the cocktail have unfortunately made HIV/AIDS less scary to many people in my generation. Without sustained and targeted prevention, many people will continue to put themselves at risk of infection.

I remember a few year’s ago reading a magazine article about HIV/AIDS and it had a lot of statistics about people most severely affected by HIV/AIDS. Most of the statistics pointed to people in my demographic. I am Black and live in an urban area; I am gay, and between 25 and 35 years old. This was very scary to read and really prompted me to do all that I can to protect myself and help educate others.

I am very fortunate to be part of an organization like the AIDS Foundation of Chicago as well as gay sports leagues, which strive to empower people and help them gain the confidence they need to address life’s challenges. I know that both are important to my identity and community.